Jeremy Clarkson

It's been another memorable year on Diddly Squat Farm - will the chickens finally come home to roost? Welcome back to Clarkson’s Farm. So, that went well . . . The spring barley crop failed. Just like the oil seed rape. And the durum wheat. Then the oats turned the colour of a hearing aid and the mushrooms went mouldy. Farming sheep, pigs and cows was hardly more lucrative. Jeremy would be better off trying to breed ostriches. But in the face of uncooperative weather, the relentless realities of the agricultural economy, bureaucracy, a truculent local planning department and the world’s persistent refusal to recognise his ingenuity and genius, our hero’s not beaten yet. Not while the farm shop’s still doing a roaring trade in candles that smell like his knacker hammock, he isn’t. On the face of it, the challenges of making a success of Diddly Squat are enough to have you weeping into your (Hawkstone) beer, but misery loves company and in girlfriend Lisa, Farm Manager Kaleb, Cheerful Charlie and Gerald his Head of Security Jeremy knows he’s got the best. And it’s hard for a chap to feel too gloomy about things when there’s a JCB telehandler, a crop-spraying hovercraft and a digger in the barn. Because as a wise man* once said, ‘there’s no man alive who wouldn’t have fun with a digger . . .’ *Jeremy Product Information: • ISBN: 9780241728192 • Author: Jeremy Clarkson • Publisher: Penguin Books Ltd • Format: Hardback • Pages: 224 • Dimensions: 24.1 x 16.2 x 2.1cm

Pull on your wellies, grab your flat cap and join Jeremy Clarkson in this hilarious and fascinating behind-the-scenes look at the farm we're all obsessed with . . . An idyllic spot offering picturesque views across the Cotswolds, bustling hedgerows and natural springs. Until one day, Jeremy decided he would do the farming itself. After all, how hard could it be? . . . Faced with suffocating red tape, biblical weather, local objections, a global pandemic and his own frankly staggering ignorance of how to 'do farming', Jeremy soon realises that turning the farm around is going to take more than splashing out on a massive tractor. Fortunately, there's help at hand from a large and (mostly) willing team, including girlfriend Lisa, Kaleb the Tractor Driver, Cheerful Charlie, Ellen the Shepherd and Gerald, his Head of Security and Dry Stone Waller. And yet while the farm may be called Diddly Squat for good reason, Jeremy soon begins to understand that it's worth a whole lot more to him than pounds, shillings and pence . . . Product Information: • ISBN: 9780241464502 • Author: Jeremy Clarkson • Publisher: Michael Joseph • Format: Hardback • Pages: 224 • Dimensions: 24 x 16.2 x 2.6 cm

Welcome back to Clarkson's Farm. At the end of Jeremy's first year in the tractor's driving seat, Diddly Squat farm rewarded him with a profit of just £144. So, while he's the first to admit that he's still only a 'trainee farmer'*, there is clearly still work to be done. Because while he's mastered the art of moaning about nearly everything, some of the other attributes required of a successful farmer prove more of a challenge. Did you know that loading a grain trailer was more demanding than flying an Apache gunship? Or that cows were more dangerous than motor-racing? Or whether would have been easier to get planning permission to build a nuclear power station than to turn an old barn into a farm restaurant? But if the council planning department and the local red trouser brigade seem determined to frustrate his schemes at every turn, at least he's got Lisa, Kaleb, Cheerful Charlie and Gerald, his dry-stone-walling Head of Security to see him through.  Product Information:  • ISBN:  9780241695791 • Author:  Jeremy Clarkson • Publisher:  Michael Joseph • Format:  Hardback • Pages:  240 • Dimensions:  15.24 x 1.3 x 23.5 cm

Another year on the Diddly Squat Farm and Jeremy is still knee-deep in mud and endless challenges. Welcome back to Clarkson's Farm. Since taking the wheel three years ago Jeremy's had his work cut out. And it's now clear from hard-won experience that, when it comes to farming, there's only one golden rule: Whatever you hope will happen, won't. Enthusiastic schemes to diversify have met with stubborn opposition from the red trouser brigade, defeat at the hands of Council Planning department, and predictable derision from Kaleb - although, to be fair, even Lisa had doubts about Jeremy's brilliant plan to build a business empire founded on rewilding and nettle soup. And only Cheerful Charlie is still smiling about the stifling amount of red tape that's incoming... But he charges by the hour. Then there are the animals: the sheep are gone; the cows have been joined by a rented bull called Break-Heart Maestro;. the pigs are making piglets; and the goats have turned out to be psychopaths. But despite the naysayers and (sometimes self-inflicted) setbacks, Jeremy remains irrepressibly optimistic about life at Diddly Squat. Because It's hard not to be when you get to harvest blackberries with a vacuum cleaner. And, after all, it shouldn't just be Break-heart Maestro who gets to enjoy a happy ending...  Product Information:  • ISBN:  9780241674895 • Author:  Jeremy Clarkson • Publisher:  Michael Joseph • Format:  Hardback • Pages:  192 • Dimensions: 15.2 x 2.6 x 23.6 cm

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